My son cares so much
I’m in the kitchen just beginning to prepare our dinner when the snacks I warmed up in the oven finished baking. I look over to my 5 year old son who is sitting near me at the dinner table, and I ask him, “do you want an egg roll as a snack?”
He looks back at me and says, “no, thank you.”
So I walk to my 8 year old son in his room and ask him the same question. He tells me he would like an egg roll, but continues to read his book (as if the egg roll would appear in his mouth on its own). I walk to the other side of our apartment and ask my wife if she wants an egg roll for a snack. She tells me that she would like one, but that she’ll over in a second to have it with some rice.
When I get back to the kitchen, my 5 year old son looks up at me and says, “make sure you’re taking care of yourself too daddy… not just everyone else.” His voice was so sweet but also so knowing (as if he were the parent). I didn’t even realize it, but he watched me ask everyone in the family if they wanted a snack while also prepping our dinner and he had the presence of mind (at 5 years old) to make sure I knew my needs as a human are important to him and to our family.
He’s also is always the first one to check in on people when they’re crying, in pain, or upset. On top of all the caring he does, he is also the funniest human being I know (not just silly - actually funny), and he also thinks everything is a joke waiting to be laughed at.
On more than one occasion I’ve found myself cuddling him while he sleeps in his bed with tears in my eyes because even in his sleep I know he gets me and wants the best for me.
The only thing I worry is that he will be just like me - constantly caring for the needs of others while not speaking up about his own needs. I push him in this regard because I see myself in him and I want to tell him the same message he told me, “make sure you’re taking care of yourself too son… not just everyone else.” I know in order for him to do this, he has to see me practice what I preach to him, and so I’ve been doing my best to prioritize myself (and let him see me prioritize myself). To go out to shows (giving myself space and time) for the betterment of me as a person (even if it means leaving my wife and kids to fend for themselves), to call in sick when I need to, to get the proper amount of sleep, and to take care of my body by exercising.
Outside of exercising, the last few weeks I haven’t been doing my best to prioritize myself, so I really needed the reminder from my son that its okay to make sure i’m taking care of myself… and not just everyone else.